I spent the day yesterday glued to a chair and a computer ... like any good ultracyclist.
I don't really like `riding' a bike. Like, `riding' through pastoral settings on a sunny day, just breathing in the scenery and delight. Boring. Too much work. Uncomfortable. I'd feel guilty for not doing something `productive.' I don't DO `joy.'
I'd rather be home watching `Bourne' reruns and drinking beer.
Most of my birth family is dead. And they should be. At least, speaking from a `lifestyle' perspective, they should be dead. Smoking, drugs, alcohol, reckless risk-taking and physical violence. Most people reading this are already nodding their heads in personal agreement. It's not like `dysfunctional families' are uncommon. In fact, in our cultures they're the norm.
Cycling is a `healthy' thing. It distracts me from depressing rumination. It's relatively inexpensive. It affords me the convenience of a passable excuse for not being more sociable. And depression, hangovers and feeling fat, weak and unhealthy are things I don't have to deal with. (Does that mean I'm avoiding a fully engaged life? Absolutely. Aren't we all! Jesus! What a tyranny to be `the best we can be.' Gag!!)
Back to ultracycling.
More than a few top-ranked ultracyclists are rich. Rich enough so that `making a living' doesn't take much time or energy. And they do what most people do: `Y'a gotta stay busy.'
More than a few really good ultracyclists compress two lives into one by shorting sleep, relationships, career/job development, family. They are as fanatical about living a `balanced' life as they are about ultracycling. And, of course, that's impossible. And, of course, `denial' is a big part of their reality.
And then there are the annoying few who are simply gifted with talent. They don't read my blog because they're lazy, busy with sleep, or playing video games in the dark on a smelly stained couch in their parent's basement (at age 40).
I kept waking up last night doing `cost/time/effort' analyses between two ultracycling options in April. Option # 1 is to do a 24 hour solo event in my own `back yard.' Option # 2 is to do a 600K brevet in Tucson, 5 hours and 250 miles south of me.
Money: Option #1 will cost me ... nothing. Option #2 will cost me gas, 3 nights in a motel, road food ... totaling about $350 bucks.
Time: Option # 1 will take about 30 hours, total. Option # 2 will take 3.5 days.
Relationships: #1, not much. In fact, my wife and the few friends I have (I'm `good' but I'm not `nice') will probably want to be involved to some degree. #2, mostly strangers to me. And on brevets and other ultracycling things I tend to ride my own pace (which is either slower or faster, but never in a group). When I'm not riding I tend to be either impatient or sort'a gruff. Or both. I like to be alone a lot. (Maybe I'm an introvert. But more likely I'm just temperamentally a grouch, often offending people with my blunt ways, unconcerned about approval or fitting in).
Being Productive: #1. You bet! Confronting challenges that are meaningful to me. #2. I'd probably come back feeling like I wasted time and money, and neglected important relationships. And only afterwords would I admit: who couldn't ride 360 miles in two days, stopping frequently and spending the night sleeping in a comfy bed?!!
I'm not much different than most people. Except that I've made it my occupation to find that out.
So that's why I used the term `Common Man' in the title of this post.
No comments:
Post a Comment