Anger is kerosene looking for a match.
Anger is `ready, FIRE, aim.'
In my private practice I'd tell my patients that `comparing yourself to others is the road to hell.' Some of us spend our life struggling to the summit of a steep climb only to discover another steep climb to another summit. And on and on.
It isn't surprising, then, to find so many feeling overwhelmed to the point of giving up.
A more considered view of `motivation' involves asking ourselves what we really desire, value, `want.' To let other's opinions of us to bleed into what we think of ourselves ... is the road to hell.
Ultracycling, I've stated elsewhere, is a humility training machine. When we try difficult things we discover strengths and limits. The term `limits,' however is elastic. The All-Terrain Human When we `stop' an activity it is usually a conscious decision rather than a physical depletion.
Twice, that I'm aware of (i.e., conscious of) in the past several months I've found myself doing things I would not have done had I not had an almost blinding sense of `anger.'
The first occurred while riding the bike through a completely desolate and empty Arizona canyon terrain. "The Beast"
Most recently I was descending a straight road with a good shoulder at 35 mph. Suddenly, a barely noticeable rumble strip appeared alongside an equally unnoticeable patch of small gravel. I skimmed the rumble strip, turning into the gravel patch and started to wobble, preceding a potentially messy `go down.'
Having had some pretty spectacular wipe-outs in this mountainous terrain over the past year and a half ... I got really angry!!
My anger `motivated' me to be determined NOT to go down. From an initial speed of 35 mph I wrestled with the slipping and sliding bike until I was doing less than 3 or 4 mph before I `decided' to accede to gravity and physics. When I did go down I didn't slide or hit the pavement with force. I literally just `laid down.' No road rash. No scratches or damage to the bike. And I immediately got to my feet.
Fear and anger use the same `wiring' in our brain. However, fear often results in `flight,' while anger often results in `fight. But, of course, it's not that simple.
Either of the fight or flight `reactions' can keep us alive. And here is where comes the distinction between a `reaction' and a `response.'
A reaction bypasses that part of us that makes us different from lower primates, i.e,, a prefrontal cortex (or forehead). (Threat > fear > reaction (flight/fight).)
The desired outcome is safety but that isn't always what happens. A `reaction' doesn't get run through our thinking brain. A `response' does.
Paleolithic (stone-age) man used to hunt large game by forming a group and then `spooking' the large game (buffalo, elephants, etc) into running off a cliff. The large game were reacting, i.e., not thinking about the possibility that they were going to be killed by a `gravity attack.'
A better response for the large game would be to look at their previous experience, compare it to the current threat, and decide what was the action that would lead to their safety. (Threat > fear/anger > thinking about what worked in the past > comparing the past to the present circumstance > a thoughtful response.)
But buffalo don't have a prefrontal cortex / forehead.
Anger, in my situation, seems to have got my `thinking' process activated to perform a series of actions that improved the odds of my safety.
But be careful.
I'm thinking, these days, how I can step back a bit to see what `lever' in my psyche that anger pulls. (I think it has to do with a mental `rehearsal' of all that could go wrong in an upcoming event so that I can plan to avoid it or minimize harm if and when the threat occurs).
So, I'm not hoping to unleash my `anger' as a tool for self-protection. Rather, I'm stepping back and using previous experience to anticipate danger. Without the `kerosene' of raging emotion.
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